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imbued with the light |
January 01 2010 @ 02:03AM
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The great fact was the land itself, which seemed to overwhelm the little beginnings of human society that struggled in its sombre wastes. It was from facing this vast hardness that the boy's mouth had become so bitter; because he felt that men were too weak to make any mark here, that the land wanted to be let alone, to preserve its own fierce strength, its peculiar, savage kind of beauty, its uninterrupted mournfulness. Freedom so often means that one isn't needed anywhere. Here you are an individual, you have a background of your own, you would be missed. But off there in the cities there are thousands of rolling stones like me. We are all alike; we have no ties, we know nobody, we own nothing. When one of us dies, they scarcely know where to bury him... We have no house, no place, no people of our own. We live in the streets, in the parks, in the theatres. We sit in restaurants and concert halls and look about at the hundreds of our own kind and shudder. Perhaps I am like Carrie Jensen, the sister of one of my hired men. She had never been out of the cornfields, and a few years ago she got despondent and said life was just the same thing over and over, and she didn't see the use of it. After she had tried to kill herself once or twice, her folks got worried and sent her over to Iowa to visit some relations. Ever since she's come back she's been perfectly cheerful, and she says she's contented to live and work in a world that's so big and interesting. She said that anything as big as the bridges over the Platte and the Missouri reconciled her. And it's what goes on in the world that reconciles me. I kept as still as I could. Nothing happened. I did not expect anything to happen. I was something that lay under the sun and felt it, like the pumpkins, and I did not want to be anything more. I was entirely happy. Perhaps we feel like that when we die and become a part of something entire, whether it is sun and air, or goodness and knowledge. At any rate, that is happiness; to be dissolved into something complete and great. When it comes to one, it comes as naturally as sleep.
[willa cather]
Public journal. More or less a stream of photos, and the occasional book excerpt.
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right in that toilet |
July 10 2009 @ 02:38PM
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So Laid to rest is a movie I have been considering for a while, was always on the fence about it. Well, the SFX is AMAZING, seriously, I had to turn my head a few times. The end disgusted me, I always think movies today are going to be more original than letting the prostitute triumph over a nice enough guy performing a public service, more or less.
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July 09 2009 @ 02:36PM
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I have to hurry! I need to go to the office and post sales <3 But! I have a velvet alice in wonderland dress in the shop, and I found the sweetest black glitter ballet flats. I can fit into a three now, thank the gods, because kids shoes are the only shoes that are made with appropriate cute-ness.
I have a rabbitfur and lace corset to post later. No time now, I'm late! I'm late! For what would appear to be a very important date!
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July 07 2009 @ 11:52PM
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When I get bored, and sad, I write things from memory of the books I love. Misworded here and there, surely, but nonetheless true.
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sdjkalsd |
July 06 2009 @ 08:27PM
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Lets be honest, now that I have an unlimited flkr account I use that alot more than LJ :p
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July 06 2009 @ 12:48AM
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Does anyone have a designer perfume that isnt too used, and want to do a trade? I have a full sized bottle of daisy by marc jacobs, only used twice - love the smell, but its too light for me, I feel like people can't smell it. I'll consider anything, but am most interested in vera wang princess or versace bright crystal or givenchy very irresistible - those are the three scents in my shopping cart right now, but I cant bring myself to pay like 200+ dollars on perfume right now.
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simple |
July 05 2009 @ 02:56AM
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I made four of five pieces of affordable, simple but pretty summer jewelry. Nothing over 20! shop!
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but she was not your wife |
July 03 2009 @ 10:43PM
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I had my hair trimmed over by a professional today and my layers touched up, I pulled out this photo of jenny lewis from my purse, printed out by a friend for me <3 and asked her to please oh please make my hair as pretty ): She picked my bangs up and jagged cut the ends, it was awkward and it isn't that straight across almost mod look I like with alot of thick bangs, I don't know how I feel about it ): I think it almost has a feather-light quality, only not in a terrible sense.
Oh, if I had Jenny Lewis's face the hair would follow, I am sure of it ): Atleast I can listen to her and sigh and dream.
I am almost considering having my hair cut shorter and done in a more 70's feather ala this - or would it be cuter left long with more layers like that up around the bang area? I don't know, I feel pretty ugly lately because I've gotten to 107 and I feel too large for my frame & I am positive my clothes don't fit right anymore, but I am trying to be healthy and focus on things a little more important than food and calories. And.. I have only cut once in the last year.. I am really trying to grow a pair, proverbially speaking, and deal with life. Sometimes it is so overhwhelming, though. I think that is the word I would best use to describe myself, overwhelmed.
Tonight I have a freezie from taco bell & an entire folder of downloaded Wolverine & Kitty Pryde comics to go through & little flower beads to make bracelets with.
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cheap books |
July 02 2009 @ 06:19PM
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July 01 2009 @ 12:45PM
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I just thought I'd post and let everyone know I finally organized the majority of my stuff onto flkr. If you have an account feel free to add me! It took me hours to brighten up and resize all of my old photos :o
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June 30 2009 @ 06:38PM
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The only character in comic-land that is worth the trouble of scanning, outside the transformers genre.
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June 27 2009 @ 10:09PM
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More transformer/gijoe comic scans behind cut
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June 26 2009 @ 11:07PM
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I love old transformers. As soon as I got season one home tonight I cracked it open and I feel very sure that there SHOULD be a drinking game, take a shot everytime Megatron chides Starscream. STARSCREAM, YOU FOOL!
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June 26 2009 @ 03:19PM
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I got my moocards! If I may quote Napoleon Dynamite: We also need some way to make us look official, like we got all the answers.
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June 25 2009 @ 12:07PM
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Because Ive been so sick, I got alot of stuff made for the shop :p Tutu, a dress inspired by MAC hello kitty, decepticon totebag, cuff set, crystal bracelet, handmade journal.
I listen to weezer when I sew.
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June 24 2009 @ 08:13PM
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OKAY. OKAY. Everyone just take a breath. FRANK WELKER VOICED SOUNDWAVE GOD, *fistpump* FUCK YEAH, LADIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK YEAH, I SAID IT. And that was about the extent of transformers2 being worth watching again.
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June 23 2009 @ 08:35AM
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I will tell you guys right now, I thought Cell was a good movie DESPITE J.Lopez, so that means it was really pretty amazing. So I stumbled over Cell2 and bought it, thinking is was surprising I hadn't heard anything about it - well, they took the amazing idea of going into a killer's mind and seeing his world and assed it all up by making this second one about telepathy, I cried a little bit for the bastardization. And the premise for this movie was even good, a serial killer who kills his victims and then brings them back to life over and over so he can keep killing them, until they beg him to die.
I am still so sick. I stopped the Cipro & started on Keflex, which I pray works because I cant use antiobiotics in the bactra or cipro families, I think the penicillin family is my last chance. I am taking benedryl every 5 hours, five steroid pills a day, and three antiobiotics. It just feels like alot of stuff to be pumping into my system :/ My chest has been tight all morning, but I cant afford ERs so I am just trying to stay very still & hope my reaction remains skin based. The only good thing about being so sick I can't get out of bed (literally, both my feet are swollen so badly I cant walk on them) is that I get to watch alot of TV like America's next top model and people bring me steak <3
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June 20 2009 @ 05:08PM
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I'm not sure how well I typed this out, having to use a mouse sensor is killing me and making everything take so much longer. Anywho, starting on the prologue to my story. The premise, of course, is a daughter who survives her father and brother and recollects her life with them.
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rock of ages |
June 19 2009 @ 06:54AM
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Lets be honest here, I hit something of a record jackpot, all five of these for under ten :) I ordered my first set of moocards because I figure it's about time I have little business cards for my shop (do any of you have photos of sets you've ordered? I'd like to see!)
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June 18 2009 @ 09:20AM
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My third favorite thing is shopping for underwear :o I like my pineapples best, I wish it was one of those with a matching bra ): I wish nice undies were cheaper or I would buy more more often.
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June 15 2009 @ 01:54PM
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We went bike riding in the brush & it was terribly hard in that I had no brakes on my five year old bike and had forgotten how to work a bike properly and ran into a few trees and fell into a briar patch ): And became very tired, I forgot how tiring it is to have a good time outdoors and you'd better believe I would have napped under a tree if life was anything like alice in wonderland only it is not and there are alot of ANTS in the world, especially on trees..
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June 13 2009 @ 10:04AM
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I thought I'd photo my record collection :) its humble, but everything but three albums were thrifted & I genuinly love everything, I dont buy things I wont listen to, so it's taken me years to find these gems :)
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blah |
June 12 2009 @ 04:47PM
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I made lingerie :) it's supposed to be, anyway. For the sake of my being an immense lady I didn't take photos that show anything, but the top is sheer lace to show breasts, the back is open corset to show back, and the skirt is cut to show butt. Obviously Tinkerbell would have gotten laid if she'd worn this for Peter Pan. In the shop!
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go back to sleep |
June 11 2009 @ 05:34AM
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Don't fret precious I'm here
I'll be the one to protect you
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June 09 2009 @ 04:18AM
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I've always wanted a beautiful kanzashi, but could never spend the money ;_; I did a trade with a really talented girl over etsy, one of my lolita skirts for this beautiful kanzashi! When I make kanzashi I cant make myself fold more than, maybe, eight petals lol. Look at this amazing flower!
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June 08 2009 @ 05:46AM
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Whenever he starts yelling now I just put a blanket over my desk and sit under it. Nooo comments, screened.
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June 07 2009 @ 11:11PM
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So apparently P has been keeping his beautiful music from me! He finally sent me a link to his former myspace. He is doing the vocals & guitar and its so beautiful. Listening to him sing is making my heart beat so fast and I am crying a little. What is this faggotry I am feeling? Oh noez.
He wont let me link the myspace because he is embarrassed and doesnt think much of this early music he did, so I uploaded one song I love because he is just retarded. Its so pretty. I didnt know boys could do pretty things.
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June 06 2009 @ 11:43PM
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I havent used aim in years, but I am bored.
unicorn fleur
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he doesnt look a thing like jesus |
June 06 2009 @ 03:02AM
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Got a new idea to do to the dolls whilst looking at shabby-chic garbage at hobby lobby.
Zombieeeeed! My Maria insisted that I bring her sister back from the dead.
The cracking was a really big pain. Once I make a few fixes with her makeup & have her an outfit sewn up she will be in the shop :)
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June 06 2009 @ 12:15AM
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I literally just got into a fight with B because I was trying to type and he kept on and on about tekken 6 on xbox, on and on and on about how I needed to look and I was finally like, yelling about how I dont give a shit about fighter games. I grabbed my screen and shook it and said I DONT GIVE A SHIT ABOUT FIGHTERS. And he was still telling me to look because Jin had a gatling gun? and you can customize your clothing and I promised him, some night when he was sleeping peacefully, I was going to murder him. The only videogame I've seen that I give a hoot about, coming out, is prototype - a game from the monsters POV hellyeahhhhh..
I have so many books I am trying to read, there is literally a pile of books by my bed with playing-card bookmarks around the first chapter of each. I just cant decide on one and when I do start on one I look at the others wantingly and want to know what I am missing. D:
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ideas for dollclothes |
June 05 2009 @ 05:46PM
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A collection of design from 1700-1900 - my scans don't really do it justice and this is only part of them - the back of every plate gives you an in-depth description of the fabric and specific fashion of each piece.
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calm down barney |
June 03 2009 @ 05:26AM
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Does anyone else on my list like little spaces? I've always liked them, I was thinking about making one under my desk where I can lay with a lamp and read, or play on my laptop. Everyone looks at me weird if they come in and im laying under a desk or table, but I just like that enclosed feeling. Sometimes I half lay under my bed, just my upper body underneath it and the rest hanging out in the open room and someone will walk in and think im stuck or hurt :p I like the quiet of it. I have always dream't of having a secret small room.
Something I want: A book of love letters from history - does anyone know of one where the letters are actually scanned? I dont want just the text, I want to see the entire thing but be able to read them, too. A fur jacket or fur wrap or fur stockings, or fur gloves. Something made out of fur, even though it is summer.
Four pretty new things in the shop!
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May 31 2009 @ 06:21PM
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I have been trying to understand zero point energy / running off of zero point after becoming interested it in a few weeks ago. I bought understanding thermodynamics & finished it with so-so interest, I found a book called engineering thermodynamics and in the excerpt it read so much easier but our libraries dont have it and it's so expensive, even used off of amazon it's near seventy dollars! I have such a hard time understanding things that are defined differently for qu/mechanics and relativity, which is the ultimate problem in psysics anyway & I am left wondering which road I am supposed to persue in my reading. There is a paper by Sir Rees I pasted to one of my desk walls titled beyond a theory of everything & whenever I get very frustrated I read over it with one cheek against my desktop in despair. In any event I bought a few cheap paperbacks on zero gravity energy sources & I tried to find something about Obama, back when he was supposed to de-classify a handful of xfiles on antigravity technology but all I found were forums of people ranting about area51.
Again, cheek on my desk in despair.
Sometimes with these things I will re-read them ten times and still not be able to tell you what I am reading, I have such a hard time and it takes me ages to get through these books & god knows I try, I put more effort into understanding the universe and our laws for it & our methods of interpreting and explaining it. I feel as though I am not really intelligent enough to grasp it beyond a basic understanding but god, I am so curious and there is so much I want to understand. I just want it.
Anyway! I came very close to buying my first bottle of wine last night, but instead ended up with a gorgeous encyclopedia of Gustave Dore's illustrations & you know, despite any former obsession I had with him I never knew he illustrated Poe's raven & I never knew he illustrated the bible!!! I mean, between paradise lost & divine comedy I should have guessed. I love his fable and fairytale illustrations!!
I watched two great movies I want to rec to you fine people! Sphere - scifi with liev schreiber (can he be any more gorgeous?) & color me Kubrick!
My favorite, red riding hood :)
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social injustices |
May 28 2009 @ 02:41AM
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I try not to watch things about movies too much, and I'd only seen the first teaser for HBP when it first came out, but I gave in and watched the newest trailer, #4? And I cried so hard I had to put my hands over my face :( I can't take hearing Snape say 'it's over'.
In any event! I want to try to find the patience to sit outside and take an hour's worth of exposures of the sky to make a big trail, but I never get past six or seven frames :/
I love opals, I really want to find an affordable opal ring.
I am debating dropping an immediate 100 on 8MM - the vintage camera, the vintage projector, the guidebook, and a spool of film; I am unsure how often I'd use it all though, as there are only a few places in the US that will process 8MM film so it would mean alot of time sending it off and waiting on it to be returned, and someone in the cinema community told me there is a rule of 20 - 20 dollars for film, 20 for processing, 20 for transferring it positive on a reel for the projector play or digitally for dvd. It's not immensly expensive but expensive enough and pain in the butt enough that I probably won't bother my hand at it - I couldnt even be bothered to fool with 120 film for holgas or dianas.
I want to read pride, prejudice & zombies: "It is a truth universally acknowledged that a zombie in possession of brains must be in want of more brains." So begins Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, an expanded edition of the beloved Jane Austen novel featuring all-new scenes of bone-crunching zombie mayhem. As our story opens, a mysterious plague has fallen upon the quiet English village of Meryton—and the dead are returning to life! Feisty heroine Elizabeth Bennet is determined to wipe out the zombie menace, but she's soon distracted by the arrival of the haughty and arrogant Mr. Darcy. What ensues is a delightful comedy of manners with plenty of civilized sparring between the two young lovers—and even more violent sparring on the blood-soaked battlefield as Elizabeth wages war against hordes of flesh-eating undead. Can she vanquish the spawn of Satan? And overcome the social prejudices of the class-conscious landed gentry? Complete with romance, heartbreak, swordfights, cannibalism, and thousands of rotting corpses, Pride and Prejudice and Zombies transforms a masterpiece of world literature into something you'd actually want to read.
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May 26 2009 @ 03:04PM
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My moving is taking longer than I thought, it always takes longer and then it never happens so just keep your fingers crossed! I was so ready to close my shop and not craft for a while, though, that I have been making things out of the butt! Three new items in my shop
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the original goth |
May 26 2009 @ 12:01AM
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This was supposed to be edgar allen, but the black dye didnt take to the mohair wig and it ended up kind of purple/brown, so I think he looks more like some bloke you'd see listening to the cure. His black velvet suit was decidedly a pain in my ass. He looks disheartened to be sitting next to lizzie borden, despite his tough, dark look :) I think they are cute together although I had originally, when he was edgar allen, intended to make him a little lenore :( I am wondeirng if a black mustache and tophat would save him.. or if he can never be edgar allen. Or if I should rip off that horrible purple hair and find a way to do black properly. He needs an overcoat, really, but when I started on one I sighed and whispered 'i hate my life' and couldnt do it. I hate making tiny man clothes.
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May 23 2009 @ 11:26PM
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I bought all of these nice things to use on my dolls, but I had to start Transformers :3
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mockup, for fun |
May 23 2009 @ 01:56AM
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Build-a-soul dolls. Each doll comes crafted for the intended spirit with a bottle of appropriate herbs and liquids mixed carefully by my achemist for optimal soul conjuration & binding, as well as the appropriate spell. Each doll has it's own, special requirements and care instructions that come with a handwritten description of the formerly-deceased - for instance, it is recommended that Lizze Borden be kept away from hatchets & axes. Build-a-soul takes no responsibility for any harm that (un)intentionally occurs after your doll is activated - you may want to sleep with one eye on them as they are prone to ... mischief.
( dollie )
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May 22 2009 @ 03:27PM
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I have been staying busy reading a book about common descent & watching specials on ebola & finding new zombie flicks - here is one for you! the mad - it's good quality, with Billy Zane! (I love Billy Zane!) but I had never heard about it! It's premise is, basically, mad cow meat turns humans into zombies. It has it's fair share of wtf like burger patties that attack people, but whatever, YOU OVERLOOK SOME THINGS. Benjamin Button was a great film, by the way - I cried for an hour, a full on hour or more, after it ended.
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May 19 2009 @ 03:44AM
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Some of this in the shop, some of it is just because
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Please, watch these |
May 19 2009 @ 02:02AM
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Anatomy of hell - French director Catherine Breillat explores female sexuality and men's darkest fears about women's sexual power in this startlingly explicit and clinical film. The story centers on a woman (Amira Casar) who pays a gay man (Rocco Siffredi) to accompany her home and watch her most private activities for four days. He accepts her solicitation and is initially turned off, but eventually the two develop an intimate relationship.
Kissed - Ever since she was a young girl, Sandra Larson has been fascinated with the darkness of death. But when she takes a part-time job as an embalmer at a funeral parlor, her obsession with the afterlife and the study of necrophilia begins to consume her every desire. As her boyfriend struggles to relate to her new lifestyle, he jumps through hoops to prove he'll do anything for love.
Babydoll - Written by Tennessee Williams, this black comedy tells the story of cotton gin owner Archie and his sexy teenage wife, who won't consummate the marriage until she turns 20. When Archie battles a rival, he could lose his business -- and his beloved child bride.
All of these are brilliant and beautiful, I suggest them! Catherine Breillat is certainly one of my favorite directors of all time. And Babydoll!! Made me love Tennessee Williams even more, if possible. Kissed, well, we don't have to ask why I loved that one.
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harajuku slashed wrists |
May 16 2009 @ 09:26PM
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Angels and demons needed less predictable plot and more angels and demons and antimatter & maybe more ewan mcgregor in catholic garb - although I think those three things in great abundance would have been a totally different movie :p I liked the CERN bits, whatever, I might read the book just to see those scenes written out.
( SI WARNING, NUDITY WARNING, HARAJUKU WARNING!!! )
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underwears oh no |
May 15 2009 @ 09:40PM
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Am I the only person who has never shopped at Ross? I thought it seemed weird so I've never gone in, but UH. I passed up twelve dollar harajuku bags, thats all I've got to say about this store o.o; I spent maybe sixty bucks and got some cute roxy and mudd underwear and sets, a nice cardigan shirt, and a cutie pair of shoes!
( underwear shopping )
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A little differently |
May 13 2009 @ 06:47PM
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Title: A little differently
Prologue
Kirk/Spock
Star Trek
I can't think of these two without feeling sad, I dont know why. I INTEND TO MAKE THIS A STORY.
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May 13 2009 @ 05:35PM
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You can say what you want about this GO! dress, everyone who was with me called it ugly, but I feel like uruha from star trek so suck on that. Dunno, it just felt trekkie to me.
Also, spock/kirk header for anyone who wants it.
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May 12 2009 @ 02:47PM
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Pretty, pretty, pretty pack from fia!
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Merriam webster |
May 12 2009 @ 11:17AM
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Vulcans have no word for love. Theirs is the second most difficult language in the united federation to learn (second only to Klingon, and only because Klingon depends on linguistic mastery for proper pronunciation). It is a language of many words, with many meanings as they pertain to a situation and in what context it falls. There are fifty-two words that culminate to learnt-knowledge. Fifteen that mean wisdom (the kind you grow into and earn with your years). Twenty-nine words for logic. There are half a dozen words to describe 'dry' and half a dozen words to describe 'wet'. But there is no word for love. Perhaps (perhaps) because Vulcans use melding to convey the emotions they feel, there is no real use for it in their language - language, in matters of the soul and heart, seemed too crass for such an eloquent people. Love, desire, want, need dripping right off the lips was too easy to confuse - no amount of proper wording could prevent making a mess out of the entire thing, spoken aloud. No, when they felt they really felt - there was no in between, no puppy love, no misplaced affection. It was something that was a simple truth - something that existed, independently, beyond description or admission. It simply was.
There is no word in Vulcan for love.
When a weathered version of the Spock James Kirk knows puts his hands to the windchapped face, the light melts into scenes: it drips into fingertips, flipbook style kisses, lingering looks, a prism of emotions held behind tight expressions and raised eyebrows. The feeling of being saved a million times over and more, the fast beat of the heart when running to rescue the one person you refuse to lose, mission after mission after mission. Desire right below the surface of it, and friendship at the core - the real kind, the kind that doesn't quit almost a century in when James is finally burried beneath the soil and Spock goes on loving him just the same, and will, until he dies as well. Kirk barely knows Spock, now, but within the mind meld they have lived a lifetime, side by side. Their lives are illustrated together, like bleeding watercolours. That is what it feels like: Spock's entire life bleeding into James Kirk, what their life was, together, once - somewhere. A feeling that is pure and absolute. Something too bright, too deep, to put into a word.
There is no word in Vulcan for love.
But with tears rolling down his cheeks and Spock's fingertips still lingering against his numb face, Kirk knows Spock's word for love (if you condense all he has done and all he has learned at the end of his long life into one floundering, unfit word). One word that is impossibly unable to convey it all but tries, on lonely nights when Spock lay alone in the dark and matches all of his language's words against all of his thoughts in an effort to understand the thing that drives his heart to go on beating, his body to go on fighting. What both cripples him to his knees and makes him an infinitely better man, as both a Vulcan and a human.
Spock's word for love is James.
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Its before noon, I shouldn't even be awake.
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panama city |
May 10 2009 @ 02:31AM
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( some photos )
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beachie |
May 09 2009 @ 12:26PM
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We skipped Destin and are all staying in a beachside condo in panama city (sis, dad, coro, cousin, cousins gf). I wanted to go to the beach to go to destin to go to the gulfarium, so I was really angry the entire three hour drive butttt .2 mile down the road is GULF WORLD, with shark shows, swimming with dolphins, exotic bird shows, touching pools etc kiddie fun stuff so I am excited again! Corrosive saw the dolphin swimming bit on the sign and jerked the wheel to the left and tried to go at ten oclock at night :p what a tard. I am kind of afraid to see him in a dolphin tank, he is going to grab onto it and just hug it and someone is going to have tro pry him off, lets be honest here.
I am so weird about my body, it looks okay in some angles but jiggling around on a beach my butt is just horrible (I AM SURE). I have three or four bathing suits in my bag, knowing I am too shy to wear them out, and got another last night at walmart :p it has peace signs! I am determined to make myself go down to the beach tomorrow morning.
I am off to pet a dolphin! I am sure my next post will be the one with 30 artsy photos of shell and wave macros. :p
( a few photos )
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